tv-homesickness

remember the early episodes of LOST? when the "monster" would make these horrifying sounds? it disturbs me to hear the EXACT SAME SOUNDS early in the morning outside my flat. sure, it could just be un-oiled security windows closing, or something steel being dragged along aluminum, or maybe a giant fucking monster. in the end it's disturbing, and it makes me not want to leave my flat.

when i get out of the elevator, the hallway is pitch black. normally i don't care and walk to a door guided by the elevator light, and as the elevator doors close the light quickly disappears. i would have 2 seconds to make it in time before the light is gone, and i'm stumbling and reaching for a doorknob. of course, there's a light switch next to the elevator door when you exit, but i like to live on the edge. everytime i exit i always look forward, imagining something hideous guarding the light switch, something spooooky, and i must not look at it, i must look only straight to my door.

when im amidst a giant crowd somewhere in paris, i usually zero in on someone who looks slightly suspicious. his eyes are shifting, there's an unusual bounce to his step, and he's constantly looking behind his back. i keep my eye on him knowing that he's actually a robot cylon (their technology has progressed so they look like us now!) and his suspicious demeanor only exacerbates his attempt to assimilate. but i'm on to him.

then i realize i'm in Le Marais, and all gay boys act like this, so i have 2 conclusions: all homosexuals are suspicious, or all homosexuals are cylons slowly trying to take over the human race and destroy earth. either way, we are fabulously doomed.

but overall, i miss the comforting spectacle of american tv with friends, discussing who's a cylon, how they'll leave the island, why christian is the best designer ever. watching these things alone (and online) just isn't the same. maybe its better that way, and it's a sign i should continue projecting asinine plots onto my paris reality, and to force me to actually live.

but come on. this season is going to be awesome. fabulous, even.